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Positive Parenting for Children with ADHD

Resource Type

Parent Handouts and Info - Parent

Description

Positive Parenting for Children with ADHD parent handout

Ages

All Ages

Age Groups

Preschool/Kindergarten (3-5), School Age (6-12), Adolescence (13-21)

Web Address

http://resources.childhealthcare.org/cocoon/dtw/parent-text/adhd/adhd_positive_parenting.html

Languages

English

Positive Parenting for Children with ADHD

Positive Parenting for Children with ADHD

The main thing children with ADHD need from their parents is love and acceptance. They need to know that their parents enjoy spending time with them and that their parents see all the wonderful things they do. You can build a positive relationship with your child and help him/her develop high self-esteem. Here are 5 positive parenting ideas you can use with your child.

#1: Play with your child everyday for at least 15 minutes. Let your child pick what you are going to play. Do not give your child lots of directions or ask them lots of questions while you play. Show your child how much you enjoy playing by smiling and laughing.

#2: Praise your child. When your child does something good, does chores, or follows directions, show your child how much you appreciate it. Be constantly on the lookout for good behavior. Praise even minor good behavior. Here are some quick phrases you can use to praise your child:

  • You're great!
  • Thank you so much!
  • You did a wonderful job!
  • You rock!
  • You're awesome!
  • I like the way you...
  • You're great at...

#3: Reward your child's good behavior. Children with ADHD need lots of rewards. Rewards do not need to be expensive or elaborate. Have rewards depend directly on how your child does in day-to-day tasks that don't come so easily for him or her. For instance, let your child have time to play on the computer after completing homework. Use gold stars, marks on his/her hands, candy or his/her favorite treat as reward for good behavior. Even a trip to the dollar store on the weekend for stickers or a small toy can be a big reward for a child.

#4: Use punishment infrequently and make punishments fair and brief. Instead of always punishing or yelling, you can try ignoring your child's minor misbehavior or redirecting your child (i.e. moving your child away from something leading to misbehavior and directing to something else). Sometimes you will need to punish your child. A punishment might be to remove privileges as needed, like watching television. When you do have to use punishment, make it brief. Instead of saying your child cannot watch television all month, try taking away television for the evening. Large punishments are hard to really carry out and parents end up forgetting about them. Over time, children learn they are not going to be followed through. Extreme punishment can also hurt the parent-child relationship. Avoid becoming very angry when you give out punishment. Unfair punishments are often given in the heat of the moment. If you get upset, take a moment to cool down before you give the punishment.

#5: Accept your child. There may be things about your child that you wish could change, but really these things are part of who your child is. For example, some parents wish their children were less "on the go," but having lots of energy may just be part of your child's temperament/disposition. Practice accepting these things about your child. If you are struggling with acceptance, sit and make a list of the things you love about your child. Add to the list every time you think of a new thing. When you are struggling with your child's behavior, read through the list. Be sure to tell your child about all his/her wonderful qualities. Children with ADHD often feel bad about themselves. They need to know their parents think they are wonderful, special people.

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