Managing the shy, withdrawn child

As the parent of a shy child, your challenge is to help your child try new things without overwhelming him. Here are some ways you can try to help your child warm up to new situations.

• Protect your child, but don't over-protect her.
• In most cases, a gradual approach is best. Slowly but steadily help your child to explore. Pushing your child into new situations too quickly may leave her overwhelmed. This will only be frustrating for your child. Begin by letting her observe a new situation. Wait until she appears comfortable, and then allow her space to play. Remain available for times when you are needed.
• Whenever possible, use other children to help draw out your shy child. If you know a child who seems gentle enough to not overwhelm your child, foster that friendship. A gentle yet engaging peer may entice your child to try new things.

Adapted from Lieberman, A.F. (1993). The emotional life of the toddler. New York: Free Press.