Reading Your Baby's Cues (Adapted from Kathryn Barnard, "Parent-Child Communication Coaching," Children's Home Society of Washington, University of Washington, Seattle-King County Department of Public Health)

Engagement cues

Cues are your baby's way of telling you what he or she wants. In the early months of your baby's life, most cues are non-verbal. When babies want to play they will turn to your voice or look at you with their eyes. These signals are called engagement cues. When babies give engagement cues, they want to be with you. To engage means to hold or attract you to be with them. This is a good time to talk, hold, feed, or play with your baby. Engagement cues that are easy to see include:

• Stilling (stops moving)
• Looking at your face
• Smooth movements of arms and legs
• Reaching out to you
• Turning eyes or head toward you
• Smiling
• Feeding sounds
• Cooing
• Babbling/talking

Engagement cues that are not as easy to see include:

• Eyes wide and bright
• Face bright
• Raising head

Disengagement cues

Babies can also tell parents that they need a break or a rest. These are called disengagement cues. To disengage means to withdraw from being with you for the moment. They may need to stop eating, playing, or being held. They may rest themselves by falling asleep. Babies may also need your help to take a break. Disengagement cues that are easy to see include:

• Turning head away
• Crying/fussiness
• Coughing/choking
• Back arching
• Falling asleep
• Squirming or kicking
• Pulling away
• Pale or red skin
• Spitting up/vomiting

Disengagement cues that are not as easy to see include:

• Turning eyes away
• Fast breathing
• Yawning
• Wrinkled forehead
• Dull-looking eyes
• Frowning
• Hand to mouth
• Hiccoughs

Imitation

Why is it important to imitate your baby?

• Acting like a mirror for your baby helps him to identify his own actions.
• Copying your baby helps her to know you are paying attention.
• Frequent contact looking at your face helps baby to know you are there for him.
• Copying involves a back and forth pattern which leads to a more balanced communication.

Recognizing emotions

Why is it important to recognize your baby's emotions?

• Babies 'talk' to us by showing their emotions.
• Being able to recognize and respond to your baby's emotions helps you to share more with your child.
• Knowing your baby's 'language' helps to strengthen the attachment between you and him.
• When you respond to your baby's emotions, he learns that he has some power over his feelings.
• Each new emotion your baby shows you is a good sign of healthy brain development.