When Infants Have Lost A Loved One

Just like older children, infants can react to losing a loved one, but they may show this reaction differently. For example, infants' eating and sleeping may become disrupted after a loss, or they may become more irritable, clingy, or even aggressive. This is a challenging time for infants and their families, who may also have experienced a loss. Here are some suggestions for making this time easier:

• Keep routines regular, and make sure your baby is being cared for by a regular, familiar person as much as possible. Routines provide babies with a sense of things being normal and may help them better recover from a loss.
• Some babies may seem to "go backwards" in their development after losing a loved one. For example, some babies may want to be held more; some may wake more frequently in the night; some may wish to be fed instead of feeding themselves. Whenever possible, this behavior should just be accepted, and your baby should be comforted.
• If night waking is an issue, your baby may do better by sleeping with you or another trusted person, if this is acceptable. Your baby can be weaned from co-sleeping later, when he or she has recovered from the loss.
• If you or other caregivers have also experienced a loss, it is important to care for yourself. Get support from whomever you can, and ask for help when you need it. Your pediatric team can provide you with counseling information if you feel this would be helpful.