Create a Point System (for parents of young children)

Children with ADHD and/or Oppositional Defiant Disorder need frequent rewards that they can see or touch to motivate good behavior. When they are young they need this more than typical children in order to have appropriate behavior. One way to motivate your child to have the behaviors you want is by creating a point system. In a point system, your child earns points for bits of appropriate behavior. After they earn a certain number of points, they can cash in their points and "buy" things they now take for granted such as TV or for special rewards. The steps below outline how to set up a point system.

Step 1: Decide how you are going to keep track of points.

• Stickers. You can keep track of points with stickers (1 sticker = 1 point). Most young children LOVE stickers and find them very motivating even without cashing them in. To keep track of the points, get a poster board and write the days of the month on the left hand side (you may need two or more boards for the month). Be sure to keep lots of space on the right hand side for all the stickers your child is going to earn. Have a space for the number of points your child earns every day. Also, have a space to record the number of points your child uses each day. Then have a column for the total number of points your child has at the end of the day. You and your child can decorate the board to make it extra special. Buy stickers that your child will like (for example, their favorite cartoon characters or smiley faces). Hang the poster board in a place your child can see every day and proudly show off to others.

Step 2: Decide what things will earn your child points. It is best to give one point (i.e. one sticker) for each thing. Work with your child to decide what will earn them points. Be sure to write the list down and hang it in a place you and your child will see every day (for example, on the refrigerator). It is important to remember that children rarely start doing tasks without a reminder. This should not be required in order to earn points. If they do, they should be given bonus points!

Sample points:

• Putting on socks in the morning by himself/herself= 1 point
• Brushing teeth when reminded without a fuss= 1 point
• Sitting at table for 5 minutes at meal time = 1 point
• Playing quieter when asked = 1 point
• Using "please" when asking for something = 1 point
• Sharing toys = 1 point

Step 3: Decide on rewards your child can buy with earned points. Rewards should not be expensive or elaborate or you won't want to persist in this system. You can reward your child with activities they like to do, not just things. Be sure these privileges do not "cost" too much. You want your child to be able to buy privileges every day. If they cannot buy rewards on a regular basis, they will lose interest and this program will not work. Really special things (for example, going out for ice cream or buying a special toy) can "cost" more. You can set limits for how your child can cash in their points. For example, your child may only be able to buy 1 hour of television time per day.

Sample rewards and point value.

• Playing board game = 3 points
• Watching television = 5 points
• Playing video games = 5 points
• Playing with special toys = 5 points
• Dessert at home = 15 points
• Allowance ($1) = 20 points
• Toy at dollar store = 20 points
• Trip to get ice cream = 50 points

Step 4: Start using your point system.

• Give your child points frequently throughout the day (for example, take an hour a day when you try to give a point about every 5 minutes).
• Be generous in giving points for behaviors that are even a little bit better than their usual. This moves behavior in the right direction gradually.
• Be enthusiastic about giving points. Tell your child what s/he did and how you feel about it every time they get points ("You came right away when I called! Now we can start eating. You get two stickers, great job!").
• You should control giving the points, not your child.
• Be sure to charge for things the child takes for granted every day e.g. TV time. Record the number of points they used. If you are using poker chips, you can take out chips for the number of points they use as they are used. If you are using a sticker chart or notebook, subtract the points used. Calculate the total of what is left each day.
• At the end of the week let your child know the total number of points they have in the "bank." They may want to use these points for something extra special.

Things to keep in mind:

• If you have not noticed a change in your child's behavior in a couple of weeks you may need to make changes. You may have the price of rewards too high or may not be giving points often enough. Adjust the points you give and the price of rewards to what works for you and your child. Your child should be getting lots of points every day and your child should be buying rewards every day.
• Remind your child about the point system throughout the day. Do not expect your child to remember. Encourage, but do not bribe, your child to do things to get points. Ask your child if he/she wants to cash in points.
• Do not take points away for misbehavior. Use separate punishments (i.e. time-out) to discourage misbehavior. If needed, you can restrict when your child can use his/her points as a result for misbehavior, but do not take the points out of the bank. Kids feel that this is unfair.
• If your child asks for a point for something that is not on the list, go ahead and give a point. This means your child is beginning to monitor their own behavior.
• You can give an extra point or two for your child doing something with a good attitude.
• You may wonder how long you have to do this. You do not have to do it forever, but you should commit to doing it for at least 2 months. Over time, your child will learn good habits and you will get in the habit of praising frequently. It is very important that you praise your child when you give points. Your child will start to feel rewarded by your praise alone. The next step is for your child to evaluate his/her own actions. Ask your child how he/she thought he/she did. Eventually you can stop using the point system but continue to praise your child and give special rewards or privileges for good behavior.