Dealing with Critical Teachers

There are certainly mean teachers who have caused kids to suffer and have had a role in turning some kids off to the whole educational system, limiting their future potential. Kids who are generally sensitive may be particularly vulnerable. Also kids who have some learning weaknesses and/or ADHD and have been subject to criticism over time can develop a hair trigger of reaction to critical teachers, and especially those who use some form of pubic class humiliation as a teaching device or because they have low self esteem themselves or are just plain "mean". Often kids can get into a vicious cycle with these teachers by retaliating with insulting remarks themselves or by withholding school work effort for the teacher as a kind of protest.

For parents the first approach is to 1. Listen to your child and try to see it from his point of view. It will be helpful to your child to know he is understood and your are on his/her side even if you believe he contributes to the problem; 2. Consider what child behaviors the teacher may be reacting to. If your child has ADHD medication may not be covering that time period well enough. Inform your child's doctor. 3. Talk to other parents who may have had kids with the same teacher. 4. Meet the teacher face to face to get your own idea of what your child is up against; 5. Meet with a principal or guidance counselor at the school. Often the teacher's confrontative style or tendency to humiliate as a way of correcting is the problem. Many counselors know how to coach teacher and students through this by creating non-verbal or coded communication systems so the child is aware of the corrective communications but also aware that, classmates are not aware of. For example, "the train is leaving the station" can be warning number one; "the ship is leaving the dock" can be number two; and "the airplane is taking off" can be number three at which point the student may need to leave the class for the office. Alternatively the teacher can touch the students' shoulder in a way that no one else knows it happened. It is necessary that the teacher meet with the child and the counselor to agree on a suitable signal system.

There are some general suggestions for kids to try in dealing with mean teachers:

A. Trying your best to adjust your attitude by: 1. putting yourself in the teacher's shoes; or 2. Working with the teacher and not against her; being on their best behavior; 3. being positive instead of complaining; 4. Restraining from talking back to the teacher; 5. Finding out what makes the teacher tick; 6. If there continues to be a problem documenting it and get your parents to advocate for you.

B. Try to be on your best behavior by: 1. Getting to class on time; 2. Listening or pretending to listen using strategies like asking questions and taking notes; 3. Participating in class discussion; 4. Avoid talking to friends or ask to be moved from tempting friends; 5. Don't make fun of the teacher even if many other kids do. 6. Think about asking for help after class; 7. Be sure not to do the above in a fake way. This link describes some of these approaches further (http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-a-Mean-Teacher).

Just remember that your teacher is likely to forget who you are at the end of the year but your class grades will haunt you after the year. Your angry reactions to the teacher will not be a problem for the teacher, so take on the challenge to do well despite having a mean teacher. You may just learn how to deal with the other mean people that none of us can avoid in life.